living with depression

Monthly Archives: January 2018

It’s been rough having flu, a raised temperature and a secondary infection. Rick has been fortunate just to have had flu which is bad enough but he has been forgiven for giving it to me. I’m assuming the secondary infection is respiratory as my right lung has been clear but my left lung hasn’t been.

The first few days I just wanted to sleep all the time. Food has tasted like cardboard so I haven’t been esaing properly. This evening I have eaten a bit better although our doggy dustbin aka Cassie has eaten well.

Last night and this evening I have been cheered up by Jacob aka JJ aka Tigger has been out with me and Cassie. JJ thinks it’s great fun and makes a game of it although he will walk with us.


Well I have had my first counselling session and will be having five more. It’s a good way to get exerise as well as the office is on the first floor at our doctor’s surgery. She has realised now how much information she has to work so this is going to be fun … not.

I also recently had a smear test done and was told I a polyp so I may nneed another smear test and would need the polyp removed. I had the hospital appointment yesterday and I don’t have a polyp. All the nurse could assume was that as I have had laser treatment 30 plus years ago that the other nurse had actually seen the scar tissue. At least it wasn’t anything serious.

Recently I spoke to my sister for an hour but it didn’t seem that long. We talked the same way as we used to before I feel out with my faamily – nothing quite like feeling loved ….


Another new year is here and I hope it will be much better than last year. Unfortunately a friend has already been predictable with being obnoxious. I really hate adults behaving like children …..

Added to that I’ve had not so great (medical) news which isn’t serious but I will be glad when it’s been dealt with. It’s just another thing that annoys me about this friend who uses pain / health as a reason for not doing much. The friend knows Rick and I have osteoarthritis as one of the health issues we deal with yet it doesn’t stop us from living to our best ability.

I am tired of life, tired of a friend taking advantage, tired of not having enough hours in the day, and tired of being tired all of the time. I want to get back to enjoying life. My problem is not knowing any more how to help myself feel better. All I have is my faith.