Monthly Archives: August 2019
It is hard to remember what a good day is and I am so tired of putting on a mask. I am becoming very quiet which Rick has picked up on but I’m too tired of putting on an act. Friends have noticed as well and a positive is they aren’t pushing me to talk.
I just wish this black mood would shift even if it was a little bit. Getting away will help a bit but we have to come back, bleh, bleh, bleh ….
It’s not every anniversary, it’s just some. On Saturday it was my son’s 38th birthday and we haven’t had contact since 2009. It hurts so much that we don’t have contact, I may not like his attitude but I still love him.
This year I got a few comments on Fb from people I’ve known since school who don’t know ‘our’ history but understand from the point of view of no contact with ‘raised’ children. One person I met on holiday whom I have reconnected with has had it hard as well and I got support from people who do know the full story.
Of course I’m still struggling with stress so that doesn’t help, just looking forward to seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.